Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend
by cell12
Summary: Eric Cartman has always made Kyle's life hell, circumstances have given Kyle the chance to humiliate his enemy. Will he succeed or will it backfire on him. Warning, later chapters feature graphic descriptions of sexual acts and abuse. Kyman.
1. Chapter 1

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend**!  
by cell12

Part 1

Kyle looked at the still form of Eric Cartman as he lay upon the hospital bed. He looked so quiet and still, almost peaceful, as he lay - covered only by the thin hospital sheet. Despite knowing that Cartman deserved everything that had happened to him, Kyle couldn't help but feel guilty. He had been the one who had resorted to violence. No, Cartman had pushed him to violence.

* * *

2 Weeks Earlier

It had been a fairly normal day for the town of South Park, the early summer weather was making everything seem so fresh and alive. Friday's were always a good day - whether you were at work or at school the week-end was always eagerly anticipated. It was a this fateful Friday that a teenage Kyle Broflovski had chosen to make his announcement.

After the home-room teacher had finished taking the register - Kyle had stood up and asked if he could speak to the class. Mr Garrison had waved Kyle on like he didn't give a shit and Kyle had taken that as permission.

Kyle had taken a deep breath and announced to the room, "I'm gay."

There was stunned silence for a few seconds and Kyle knew to let the news sink in, "I'm the same person and I'm OK with who I am. I don't want to be treated any differently."

Wendy Testaburger interrupted him with a question, "Have you told your parents yet?"

Kyle flashed her a smile, "I told my parents a couple of weeks ago," he raised his hand up to pre-empt a follow up question, "they were pretty OK about it. I told my closest friends a few days later."

Wendy cast Stan a 'why didn't you tell me' look. He just shrugged his shoulders.

"Do you have a boyfriend?" Clyde asked.

"No," Kyle smirked, "Are you interested?" he said this to tease Clyde knowing full well that he was dating Bebe right now.

Clyde wilted under the laughs and a fierce glare from his girlfriend.

Sitting at his desk a few rows away was Eric Cartman, the fat-ass, the Hitler-loving jerk who made Kyle's life a misery on a daily basis. To all outward appearances he was bored to tears with the mornings surprise news but inside he was quietly seething. The sneaky Jew-rat had openly told everyone in class that his closest friends already knew about him being gay. Eric hadn't known, he had not been told anything, not even second hand from Kenny. How could he rip on the daywalker for this without everyone knowing that he wasn't considered one of Kyle's friends. He would look like a tool, a desperate kid who hung out with guys who didn't really want him there. A looser with no friends. And Kyle had probably planned it this way. The kike had probably worked out that he would have no options other than to quietly act like he knew all along and didn't have a problem with it.

Mr Garrison interrupted the questions flying at Kyle with his usual apathetic sarcasm, "Kyle if you've finished with your impromptue gay Q&A, then can I please have a quiet few minutes before the bell goes." Just as he finished speaking the bell rang, "Fuck," the teacher could be seen muttering under his breath.

Cartman somehow managed to keep his rage in check all day. He was polite to the teachers, respectful to the other students and he even managed to appear friendly to his three so-called friends. He cheerfully acted like nothing had happened - like they hadn't excluded him from their lives, again.

The day came to an end and everyone was glad when the final bell went. For Kyle, however, his tension had been building up all day. Why hadn't the Fat-ass said anything? Was he planning something truly horrible?

Kyle waited until they were walking home before he confronted the larger boy. It was just the two of them, Stan was at football practice and Kenny was either dead or hitting on some chick, "Aren't you going to rip on me, Fat-ass?"

Cartman paused and feigned surprise, "About what Jew?"

"Me being gay," Kyle turned and pushed himself up into Cartman's personal space.

Cartman looked down into Kyle's green eyes, "And why should I do that, Kahl?"

Kyle was steaming, "I've just come out to the whole class and you haven't said anything."

Cartman shrugged his shoulders, "I thought that you would like that."

Kyle stepped back - was Cartman behaving like a decent human being for once. No, it was Eric Cartman - ass-hole extraordinaire - he was incapable of kindness and decency.

"I think you're going to get plenty of insults and hate without me adding to it Kahl," Cartman paused - thinking quickly, "and besides, you've made it too easy."

Kyle looked confused, "Easy?"

"Yes, I've decided that you are no longer worth the effort," Cartman moved past Kyle to continue on his way home. He didn't even glance at the Jewish boy.

Kyle started to follow, seething he murmured under his breath, "Fat-ass."

Cartman heard the comment and turned back to face Kyle, "Unless."

"What?" Kyle braced himself for an expected homophobic barrage.

Cartman smirked, "You want me to insult you, in fact I think you like it - perhaps a little too much."

Kyle was stunned - this was not what he was expecting, "What are you saying fat boy?" He managed to splutter.

Cartman pushed himself into Kyle's face - his breath still warm as it hit the smaller boy's eyes, "What I'm saying is that you get a thrill off arguing with me."

Kyle was too stunned to speak so Cartman continued, "I wouldn't be surprised if you jerked off tonight while replaying this conversation in your head. You've always been a freak, Jew, but I guess now I know how much of a pervert you really are."

Kyle screamed and tried to jump at Cartman and bring him down but the years had been kinder to his enemy, who was now more than a head taller - with far more muscle and bulk. "I'll kill you Fat-ass," Kyle raged.

Cartman appeared unaffected by the Jew's assault, he just placed one hand onto Kyle's shoulder and pushed. The smaller boy was sent sprawling into the snow a few feet away.

Cartman knew he was winning and he decided to push Kyle even further, "Remember those haiku's you made up to insult me? Well I've thought up a fun rhyme about you Kahl - because I'm such a good friend." Cartman paused - a shit-eating grin on his face, "Kahl the kinky kike, you can never tell just what, weird sex shit he'll like."

Kyle's fists gripped into the snow, he hated Cartman so much right now that he could barely think.

"Do you like it Kahl? I sure do. In fact I like it so much that I think I''ll share it with all my friends - and by friends I mean everyone at school." Cartman tilted his head and smiled, "You know, I think it's so good that it might even make the morning announcements."

Kyle gathered himself and charged, screaming, at the larger boy. This time he kept low and hit Cartman's legs sending the Fat-ass tumbling over. Kyle's eyes were tight-shut so when he heard the screech of breaks and a thud he was shocked. Finally opening his eyes he saw his enemy draped across the bumper of a grey sedan. What had he done?


	2. Chapter 2

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend**

by cell12

**Part 2**

Cartman woke up and everything was strange. His whole body felt fuzzy. Even before he opened his eyes he knew that he was flat on his back in bed. He also knew that it wasn't his bed. The mattress was hard and lumpy and he was only covered by a thin sheet and blanket - he could tell this by the weight of them pressing against him.

Tentatively he opened his eyes - like the rest of his body - his vision was fuzzy. He could vaguely make out a human shape sitting next to the bed. In a casual sort of way he recognised that the human shape was Kyle, he also could feel the drip plugged up to his arm. He groaned - something must have happened that put him in hospital. He wondered what it was.

Kyle had heard the fat boy groan and when he looked up at his face, Kyle had seen that Cartman's eyes were open, "Eric you're awake."

"Kahl," Cartman managed to word.

"I'm so glad that you're OK," Kyle had tears running down his face, "I've been so worried."

Kyle leaned down and hugged Cartman. He felt so relieved - mainly because the larger boy appeared to be fine but also because he had felt so guilty. Kyle had spent, every possible moment for, the last two weeks at the fat boy's bedside in a self-imposed purgatory. At first he had told himself that his daily visits were entirely down to guilt - but there was something else. As he had watched his comatose enemy he had felt a gentle sadness - almost like grief. Why couldn't they be friends, why did they have to fight so much and why didn't Cartman like him? As Kyle became more comfortable around the helpless form - the person he used to hate - he'd also become more intimate. It had started with using a tissue to wipe drool that escaped from Eric's lips but before long the he had taken to greeting the Fat-ass with a kiss on the cheek and jovial chat. In fact, for the last few days, he had been pouring out his thoughts and secrets to the sleeping Cartman. Using him, almost like, a diary and knowing that he would get no answer.

Eric could feel the Jew's tears dripping onto him. He thought about all the mean things he had done to Kyle - things designed to get the smaller boy to cry. None of them had worked, but now Kyle was crying openly and unashamedly for him - Eric couldn't help but feel slightly ashamed.

Without thinking Kyle kissed Eric's face as he hugged him.

As Kyle pulled back, away from him, Eric was puzzled, "Why did you kiss me?" He asked.

Cartman's voice snapped Kyle back into reality. This wasn't the sleeping body he'd confided all his secrets and problems to, that he'd grown to care about. This was Eric Cartman - the person who made his life hell on a daily basis.

Cartman was still looking at him and waiting for an answer.

Stalling for time Kyle asked, "You don't remember what happened?"

"No, was I in an accident?"

Kyle nodded, "You were hit by a car when we walked home from school."

"Was it a drunk-driver?"

Kyle used the same lie that had worked with the police, "No you slipped on some black ice and fell in front of the car."

Cartman just took the information in without reaction. After a pause he fixed his eyes back to Kyle - his vision was clearing and he could see how worn out Kyle was, "So why did you kiss me Kahl?" He asked again.

"You really don't remember?"

"I've told you that already Kahl." Eric tried to sit up, "Why are you acting so strangely - it's like you're my girlfriend or something."

At that moment a thought struck Kyle, it was an evil thought and he should have been above such an act of deception. Kyle remembered the hurtful poem that had lead him to cause Cartman's accident. The Fat-ass was so intolerant of minorities or anyone who strayed from the straight, white, American, Christian norm. It would be poetic justice to have Cartman become a minority and to suffer the hate that came with it. Kyle couldn't change Eric's race, religion or ethnicity but he could trick Eric into thinking he was gay. It would require a huge personal sacrifice on his part but boy would it be worth it.

Kyle looked at Cartman and spoke with sadness, "You don't remember us."

"Us?" Cartman looked puzzled.

Kyle took a deep breath and swallowed, "Cartman, I'm your boyfriend!"


	3. Chapter 3

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

by cell12

**Part 3**

Cartman appeared shell-shocked, "Is this a joke," he said.

Kyle rose to his feet and shook his head, "I should tell the nurse that you're awake."

"Kahl?"

Kyle was near the door before he turned around, "I'm sorry that you don't remember."

Kyle left the room and Eric only had his own thoughts to occupy him. How could he be gay? How, on earth, could he be with the Jew? It didn't make sense. He could still feel Kyle's tears wet on his face, he raised a hand to wipe them away. Kyle had cried for him. Kyle had lost sleep over him. Kyle had waited patiently at his bedside. Maybe Kyle was telling the truth.

Just then a large bustling woman entered the room, "Your friend informed me that you'd woken up," she smiled and moved closer, "how are you feeling?"

"Confused," Eric replied.

"Your friend also informed me that you'd lost some memories," she busied herself removing the drip from his arm and writing on the chart at the end of the bed, "don't worry that's normal. They should come back to you over the next couple of days. Does your head hurt at all?"

"No, my vision was a bit blurry at first but it's better now. I feel a bit weak and energy-less though." Cartman demonstrated this by lifting his arms listlessly.

"That's just a side effect of your medication," she tugged at the covers to tidy the bed, "it's nothing for you to worry about. You should try to get some sleep. He must be a good friend, he's hardly left your bedside."

As if by magic, the nurses mention of sleep made Eric yawn and he dropped back into the covers with no complaints. A few seconds later he was fast asleep.

* * *

Outside, in the hall, Kyle was hastily making arrangements over the phone. He had already called Liane - Eric's mom - to let her know that her 'special little muffin' had woken up. He was now phoning Kenny, to help put his plan into action.

"Hey Ken."

"Kyle," Kenny's voice was hopeful, "has Fat-ass woken up?"

"Just a few minutes ago," Kyle was nervous - but trusting Kenny was his only option, "I need you to do me a favour."

"Sure, what?"

"I need you to take some of my stuff and put it in Eric's room and some of his things and put them in my bedroom."

Kenny was confused, "Why?"

"I told Cartman that he was my boyfriend."

"Again, why?"

"To mess with him, of course," Kyle's voice turned to a hiss, "I want him to find out what it's like to be a minority."

"So you're going to make him gay?"

"Yes."

"I don't think you can force someone to be gay, Kyle."

"Cartman's done a lot of gay stuff before, Kenny," Kyle explained, "I'm just helping it along."

"And this is to mess with him?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure that you don't have any other motives?"

Kyle spluttered, "Don't be stupid, Kenny, I hate that Fat-ass."

"Why do you need revenge, Kyle? Didn't you hurt Eric enough when you pushed him in front of that car?"

"What!" Kyle was shocked. How had Kenny known about that.

"I never believed your black ice story. I figured that he said something really bad and you got so pissed that you pushed him into traffic."

"I tackled his legs," Kyle spoke quietly, "he said something so vile that I just lost it."

Kenny wanted to ask Kyle what Cartman had said but he knew to keep his mouth shut and wait for the Jewish boy to continue.

"I never meant for him to get run over."

"You never answered me when I asked you why you needed revenge, Kyle."

"He's made my life hell for years, I think I deserve some payback."

"I'm not sure if this is a good idea."

"Fifty dollars."

"What?"

"Fifty dollars, in my lock-box, in my room. I'll give you the combination."

"Why aren't you doing this yourself?"

"I need to stay here and play the concerned boyfriend."

Kenny tried again to dissuade Kyle, "Stan isn't going to like this."

"I'm doing this Kenny."

"Fine," Kenny knew he would cave - even before Kyle mentioned the money. He had long suspected that his two friends were meant for each other. "I'll buy some condoms and lube and plant them in his bedroom as well."

"What," Kyle spluttered, "why would you do that?"

Kenny sniggered, "For a gay guy you sure don't know much about gay sex."

Kyle didn't say anything so Kenny continued with his explanation, "Unlike the pussy, an ass doesn't produce any natural lubrication."

"I know that," Kyle snapped.

Kenny decided to tease Kyle, "I could get you some dildos and but-plugs as well if you want."

"No," Kyle was disgusted at the thought, "I was going to tell him that we hadn't done it yet."

Kenny laughed, "Where's the fun in that? If you really want to mess with his head, let him think that you're screwing."

"Maybe," Kyle looked at his watch, "look, Kenny, I've got to go. I still have to call Stan and my parents. You will do this for me, won't you?"

"I said I would," Kenny responded, "but I think I should get more than fifty dollars."

"Isn't it enough?"

"Fifty dollars for the job and another fifty to not tell anyone." Kenny would have helped for nothing but Kyle was loaded and giving Kenny one hundred dollars wouldn't hurt him.

"For that I expect you to lie and say that you knew we were seeing each other in secret."

Kenny grinned as he made his deal.

* * *

_**Authors Note:** For those who haven't seen the message tacked onto the end on my profile. I have already completed this story, it's what I've been working on in secret for the last month. As of right now it's sitting in files on my computer. I will post a new chapter every 2-3 days - 13 chapters in total. I may post sooner if I get plenty of interest._


	4. Chapter 4

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend**

by cell12

**Part 4**

"Tell me about us," it had been a couple of days and Cartman was much better, he was already chomping at the bit to be let out.

Kyle was grateful that the school holidays had started and he had plenty of free time. The Jewish boy had been practically camped in Eric's room and he had slowly been trying to get the Fat-ass to trust him.

"I don't know if you're ready to hear this," Kyle started.

Eric interrupted Kyle, "I'm bored out of my mind here, the food is terrible - they seem to have got me on some vegetarian diet thing - and I can't remember anything about dating you. I want to believe what you've been saying Kahl but it's so hard."

Kyle had mentally prepared himself - he'd even rehearsed what he was going to say with Kenny, "OK Eric, I'll tell you whatever you want to know."

"Do we have pet names for each other?"

Kyle hadn't been expecting that, he swallowed and teased to buy himself some time, "Try to guess them."

Eric smiled and then grinned, "Do I call you Jew?"

"Cartman," Kyle couldn't help the slightly annoyed tone of his voice, "it's supposed to be an affectionate name for someone you care about."

Eric looked slightly ashamed, "Sorry," he said, "I guess the whole us-dating thing is hard to get my head around."

"Try again," Kyle encouraged.

"Maybe if you gave me a clue,"

Kyle thought, "You started calling me it after our first date."

"Where did we go?"

Kyle tried to quickly think up a typical first date venue - one where they wouldn't be spotted by other kids, "We just watched a movie and had a meal at Bennigans afterwards."

Cartman responded, "I bet you made a big deal about eating kosher."

Kyle nodded and blushed, lowering his head.

Eric noticed Kyle's face, "That's it isn't it," Kyle looked up startled, "kosher boi. I call you kosher boi." Eric's face came alive with a big grin.

"How," Kyle stopped himself - kosher boy did sound cute when the Fat-ass said it and it was way better than some possible nicknames. "It's usually 'my kosher boy' - as in, I love you my kosher boy." He decided to add a proviso though, "We only use our pet names when we're snuggled up together in private."

"And what do you call me, Kahl?"

The only thing Kyle could think of, was that Cartman's middle name was Theodore like the former president who had a famous type of cuddly toy named after him, "Teddy bear," he spluttered - slightly nervous, "I know it's stupid but."

"I don't think it's stupid Kahl," Cartman's silky accent was starting to get to Kyle - like a cobra enticing it's prey, "I can see the connections. Remember those Wellington Bear pyjamas I used to wear?"

"I always thought that you looked cute in them," Kyle answered without thinking.

Cartman responded, "I never would have said it but I always thought those Terrance and Philip pyjamas you had were kewl."

"When did we get too old for pyjamas and start wearing shorts and t-shirt?" Kyle couldn't believe it he was actually talking to Cartman like they were friends and it felt great.

"So Kahl, how did we start dating then?"

Kyle was nervous, this was the question he had been expecting. The question he had thought about and prepared a convincing story for, "You had found out I was gay and were being an ass about it."

Cartman shrugged, like he expected that of himself.

Kyle continued, "I'd already come out to Stan, Kenny and my parents, I didn't want you to know but somehow you had worked it out." To forestall Cartman's obvious question he added, "Don't ask me how, you never told me."

"Go on."

"We were at your house for a night of video games and pizza. It was supposed to be all four of us but Stan had cried off for a date with Wendy and Kenny never showed. We played for a while and you were ripping on me. I said that I was going to leave and you said that it was probably a good idea as you didn't want to catch the gayness off me."

Cartman looked shocked, "I said that?"

"I can't remember your exact words, but yeah," Kyle ran his hand through his hair. "I insisted that you couldn't catch being gay and we argued - like we usually do. In the end I got so pissed off that I decided to prove my point by kissing you."

"You kissed me?" Cartman sounded slightly stunned.

"Yes, and after a few seconds of shock, you started to kiss back."

Cartman was leaning forward now, caught up in Kyle's story.

"I thought that you were just wanting to win the argument so I took it up a notch. I started to french you - running my tongue against your lips and teeth. To my surprise, you opened your mouth and we started making out."

"Was I a good kisser?"

Kyle thought about this - he didn't want to bolster the Fat-asses ego but he had to sound like he was hot for him, "I didn't have a lot to compare it against but I liked it."

Cartman nodded, "Then what happened?"

"I was moaning and grinding up against you and your hands were on my back and ass - pulling me closer to you. Then," Kyle stopped.

"What?" Cartman had taken the bait.

Kyle looked embarrassed, "We both creamed our shorts."

"Fuck," Eric said.

"I was shocked and tried to pull away and get up but you held me close and snuggled me." Kyle smiled, "I think you said something about resting for a while before we cleaned up."

"So I won the argument?"

"God, Cartman, what is it with you and that argument?" Kyle couldn't believe that he was buying it, "You were already gay or a least bi-sexual. What we did just brought it out."

"No Kahl, I was straight and you made me gay - admit it."

"Fine, you win, I made you gay," Kyle made his voice sound hurt, "Are you happy now?"

"Kahl?"

"It doesn't matter whether I made you gay or not, you don't remember any of it," Kyle managed to force out a few tears.

"Were we happy?"

"I was," Kyle thought about his answer, "you seemed to be - you were way calmer and nice."

Cartman's reply came at almost a whisper, "I wish I could remember it."

Kyle had to choke back a laugh, "I can remember it for you."

Cartman appeared thoughtful, "If we kiss, it would be like a first kiss all over again - wouldn't it?"

Kyle nodded, "Do you want to kiss me?"

"Maybe," Eric answered shyly.

Kyle leaned over and kissed Cartman, he felt his enemy respond - pulling him into an embrace. It was really hot and Kyle could feel himself getting hard. He kept trying to tell himself that this was the Fat-ass and he shouldn't be getting turned on - but it didn't work. Cartman was holding him in his arms and Kyle couldn't help but feel like it was the only place in the world where he ever wanted to be. He felt so safe, so warm and so loved.

Shit, Kyle thought, I've fallen in love with Cartman.


	5. Chapter 5

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend**

** by cell12**

**Part 5**

It was the day of Eric Cartman's release from hospital and everyone was there, fussing around him. Kyle was in a turmoil with his emotions. The Cartman he'd gotten to know over the last few days was so supremely different to what he was used to. When Kyle was away from the highly charged atmosphere of Eric's bedside he could steel himself to stick with the plan to humiliate his enemy - but when he was with Eric, talking to him and just being close to him, all reason fled his mind and he just wanted to throw himself into the arms of the fatter boy and never let go.

Kyle tried to tell himself that the improvement in Cartman's behaviour and his general mellowness was down to the drugs he was on. Kyle had learned that his pretend boyfriend's coma had been drug induced to prevent movement and to reduce blood flow to the brain. Apparently the doctors had been concerned about his brain swelling due to the accident. Cartman's memory losses had also been a concern and Kyle had felt guilty about that. Eric had to undergo a battery of tests and talks with various medical staff - which annoyed and frustrated him no end. Kyle had found himself, in the position of, comforting Cartman through, what was, a distressing time. It was the sort of thing that brings couples closer and they had been no exception.

Eric had told Kyle to make his own decisions and be proud of them - the world doesn't have a place for regrets. He had then stunned the Jew by telling his mom all about their secret relationship and had shown no shame in being openly affectionate with Kyle. His only doubts being when he was unsure whether Kyle wanted to continue their relationship or break it off due to his loss of memory.

Of course Kyle's mom had her own way of handling the news.

"Kyle, I'm not sure if I approve of your relationship," Shelia Broflovski voiced her opinion loud and Kyle blushed - looking around to see if anyone else had heard.

"Mom," Kyle answered, "You said that you were going to be supportive about me being gay. You even said you would accept any boyfriend I brought home and make them welcome."

"But Kyle," she replied on her nasal accent, "he isn't a boyfriend, he's Eric Cartman. How can you expect me to approve of him."

Kyle winced - when she said Eric's name his mom sounded like she was talking about dirt, "You don't know him, not the real him anyway. Underneath all the attitude and bad behaviour is a lonely boy who needs to love and be loved so much. I'd seen brief glimpses of it before but it wasn't until recently that I realised that those flashes were showing who he really was and the rest was just a front."

Shelia looked at her son with something close to pity in her eyes, "You've got it bad, haven't you Kyle."

Kyle nodded and looked down, expecting more harsh words. Instead he felt himself being pulled into his mother's arms as she hugged him.

"You're an intelligent, insightful young man Kyle, I'm willing to trust your judgement on this," she paused to fix Kyle in the eyes, "I hope my trust won't be misplaced."

Stan had been a easier sell on the whole Eric and Kyle relationship - of course he was only told the same made up story as Cartman. Kyle didn't like lying to his best friend but he knew that Stan wouldn't approve of what he was doing. When Stan had a problem he always ran to Kyle for advice, unless Kyle was the problem then he would go to Wendy. Obviously Wendy would tell her best friend, Bebe, everything and from there it would only be a matter of time before Kyle's whole plan was exposed.

Other kids from their class had acted like it was inevitable that they would end up together. Kyle had taken their jokes as harmless - just the usual teasing guys throw at each other. Cartman on the other hand, had returned every insult and joke with interest. To Clyde's sly dig that Cartman was only dating Kyle because no girl would have him, Eric had responded that Kyle would look way hotter in a dress than Clyde's girlfriend. Maybe it was rose-tinted glasses, but Kyle now found Cartman's come-backs and put-downs cute and witty. He could also see how many verbal assaults Eric had to endure on a daily basis. Kyle realised how much all the insults hurt Cartman and how cruel they were.

* * *

Cartman hadn't been out of the hospital two minutes before he started telling his mom about the awful hospital food. His mom tried to explain that the hospital insisted that the was put on a diet while he was there but this didn't shut Eric up.

Kyle was able to stem Eric's grumbling in the car by snuggling up to him, kissing him on the cheek and saying, "Shush, grumpy."

Kenny, who was riding in the front of the car found this hilarious, "I can't believe that you've got him under control so fast Kyle. I expected it to take at least another few months."

"You knew?" Stan asked, his voice sounding jealous.

Kenny nodded, "I sort of found out by accident. They didn't know that I knew about them."

Stan broke the silence that followed Kenny's remark, "So what are your plans for tonight?"

"Well," Cartman's mom spoke, "Eric has only just got out of hospital so I think he should take it easy."

Cartman jumped in straight away, "No way mom, I've been stuck in hospital staring at four walls for ever. I need to do something fun."

"What did you have in mind?" Kenny asked.

"Ah was thinking of a date," Eric blushed slightly and looked out of the window.

Kenny responded, "I'm flattered, Fat-ass but I think your boyfriend wouldn't be too pleased." On saying that Kenny and Stan started laughing and Kyle had to hide a smirk.

"No Kenny, it's a bad Kenny!" Cartman tried to lean forward and smack Kenny across the head - Kenny dodged by ducking down in his seat.

"Calm down dude," Stan was trying to be the voice of reason, "we know that you meant Kyle. Kenny was just messing."

"Kyle," Stan asked, "when you came out in school you said that you didn't have a boyfriend."

"So," Kyle tried to stay calm.

Stan continued, "Why didn't you tell us you were seeing someone? You didn't have to name him."

"Don't be stupid Stan," Kenny answered, "if people knew that Kyle had a secret boyfriend everybody would have been watching him and trying to find out who."

Stan scratched at his head, "I don't get it, why didn't you both just come out as a couple."

Kyle knew what to say to that, "Eric wasn't ready - he wanted to be sure that we would last, as a couple, before going public."

Stan was trying to understand, "So, Kyle, why didn't you wait until you were both ready?"

"I wanted to test the waters," Kyle replied, "show Eric that there was nothing to fear in coming out at school. Since my friends and family already knew, it wasn't really a problem for me."

"I guess that makes sense." Stan toyed with the zipper on his jacket before changing the subject, "So Cartman, what are your date plans for tonight?"

"Not sure yet," Eric looked at me and grinned, "it all depends on how long I can pry Kahl away from his mother."

"Didn't I tell you," Kyle smiled shyly at Cartman, "my mom's letting me sleep over tonight."

Liane added, "That's right hun, I have to work tonight so Kyle has agreed to stay and look after you."

"But mehm, I don't need any looking after," Eric stopped - Kyle's was using a finger to draw circles on his chest. "I guess it's OK."

Kenny laughed again and this time even Cartman saw the funny side.


	6. Chapter 6

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**Part 6**

It wasn't long before they pulled up outside Cartman's house and Kyle and Eric's mom rushed to help him.

"I can walk," Eric said as he strode to the door like normal, "Kahl you best get home. I want you looking hot for our date." He leaned over and kissed Kyle.

Kyle blushed and nodded, before running off, Stan followed waving his hand at Kyle and shouting for him to wait up.

"So what are your plans, Fat-ass?" Kenny asked as he followed Cartman inside. Kenny anticipated that a hungry Cartman would be demanding some food and Eric's mom wouldn't leave him out.

"I don't know Kenneh. I was thinking of recreating our first date," Eric turned to his mom, "Could you make me and Kenny something to eat. Ah can't remember my last good meal."

Liane smiled, dotingly, at her son, "What would you like poopsikins?" She asked.

Eric thought for a second, "Home-made burgers with fried onion rings."

Kenny nodded - Cartman's mom's burgers were way better than anything you could buy.

"It will be about half-an-hour hun," Liane smiled after she answered.

Cartman nodded his acknowledgement, "Me and Kenneh will be upstairs," he started up towards his bedroom - expecting Kenny to follow.

"Thank you Mrs C," Kenny said before rushing after his friend.

When Kenny entered the bedroom Cartman was already at the wardrobe, pawing through the clothes and obviously looking for something good to wear. Kenny sat down on the bed and listened to Eric muttering, "No, no, hell no, maybe."

After five minutes of this Kenny asked, "Do you need any help?"

Cartman turned to look at Kenny and nodded.

"Wear the faded black jeans," Kenny pointed to a item disguarded on the floor, "your ass looks good in them."

Cartman looked slightly embarrassed, "These, sort of, don't fit me."

"They'll fit," Kenny insisted, "you lost a ton of weight in hospital."

Cartman picked a green shirt out of the wardrobe, "Will this shirt go with them?"

"You know," Kenny laughed, "I thought that gays were supposed to be good at this stuff."

"Shut up Kenneh," Cartman shouted - his accent more pronounced because he was flustered, "Ah'm not ghay."

Kenny sniggered, "You're getting ready for a date with your boyfriend. How is that not gay?"

Cartman tried to sound dignified, "Your not gay until you have butt-sex."

"So," Kenny couldn't resist adding, "how do you know that you and Kyle haven't done it yet?"

Cartman looked aghast, "Kahl would have told me, wouldn't he?"

"Not if he thought it would upset you," Kenny was trying to hold back his laughter.

Eric's jaw dropped.

"I guess you'll just have to ask him," Kenny said before spinning out of the room.

* * *

Meanwhile, Kyle was also getting himself ready. As well as choosing his outfit for the night, Kyle was packing for the sleepover afterwards. His mom had already reminded him twice about his medicine and had told him that he could call at any time, for any reason - even if it was the middle of the night and they would come to collect him. He had found a new aftershave with chocolate undertones which he hoped Eric would appreciate. Not that he really shaved yet - but he wanted to make an effort. Even if Cartman didn't know it, this wasn't just their first date it was also Kyle's first date - ever. Kyle was nervously anticipating a great night.

* * *

Cartman spent the afternoon playing video games with Kenny before going upstairs to take a shower at half four. He had texted Kyle to arrive at six and wanted to give himself plenty of time to get ready.

Finally Eric came down the stairs, "How do I look Kenneh?"

Kenny, who was just leaving, eyed his friend up and down, "You've forgotten you socks."

"Shit," Cartman exclaimed before rushing back up the stairs.


	7. Chapter 7

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**Part 7**

A little before six Kyle arrived, more nervous than he would have thought possible. Eric, practically, threw the door open in his haste to greet his boyfriend. Obviously they spent a few seconds looking each other over. Eric had thrown a red and gold baseball jacket over his green shirt. Kyle was wearing his usual hat and orange jacket.

Cartman eyed him suspiciously, "I hope you've got something good on under that jacket."

Kyle winked, "Maybe there's nothing under here."

Cartman arched an eyebrow, "Seriously?" seeing Kyle's mischievous smile he continued, "Well you'll be cold and embarrassed if you have to take it off during our date."

"I can always snuggle up to you to keep warm," Kyle replied.

Eric pulled the door shut, behind him, and locked it, "Mah mom's already left for the evening."

Kyle pressed himself against the larger boy, "We could just stay home."

Eric looked at Kyle, "Ah'm sick of staring at four walls, I need to stretch my legs and be around people for a change."

"I guess you're wanting a bit of excitement after being cooped up for so long," Kyle smiled, "so what are we doing?"

Cartman nodded and grabbed Kyle's hand, "Ah wanted to do the same as we did on our first date," earlier he had thought this a good idea - but now, saying it out loud, it seemed stupid, "since I don't remember it at all."

Kyle smiled, "That sounds good Eric." Their 'first date' had been thrown together in Kyle's mind.

As they walked towards town Cartman asked, "So what film did we see?"

Kyle's mind went blank - he should have looked up what films were playing last month, "I don't really remember," he hoped Eric would buy his explanation, "we spent most of the time making-out."

"Couldn't get enough of me, eh," Eric chuckled.

"I can never get enough," Kyle replied.

They were soon at the cinema, looking at the posters and debating the merits of each film.

Cartman was insistent that they shouldn't watch anything depressing, "It's either the comedy or the action film Kahl."

"What about the horror?"

Cartman looked at Kyle, "Modern horror films are crap, they're all about shocks and screams with no depth or subtlety. A good horror film is about building suspense and tension, something that most modern directors don't seem to understand."

Kyle was impressed with Eric's answer - he didn't just demand his own way but instead explained his reasoning, "So the horror's out, what's wrong with the drama?"

"Kahl, a chick-flick, seriously?"

"I dunno," Kyle pouted bashfully, "don't you want to see something romantic?"

"Ninety minutes of two people trying to get up the nerve to say I love you and want to be with you. I hate that," Eric's voice softened, "not so much the romantic comedy's though, at least they have the laughs to keep your attention."

"I want to see that," Kyle pointed at the poster of the latest rom-com.

"Fine," Eric slid his arm over Kyle's shoulders, "I'm warning you now though, if I get bored I'll be looking for something else to do."

Kyle looked up to take in his boyfriends hazel eyes, "Let's hope it's crap then."

The movie turned out to be pretty funny after all, although Cartman did take the opportunity to make out with Kyle during the lulls in the story. When they kissed, Kyle could taste the chocolate bar and popcorn Eric had bought from the concession stand. They got a few stares from people but had both ignored them.

After leaving the cinema Kyle asked about the rest of the evening.

"I booked our table for nine so we have plenty of time," Cartman answered as they walked along - Kyle pressed up close with Eric's arm around him.

"You know," Kyle said as they waited to cross the street, "you don't have to pay for everything, Eric."

"That's what a guy does on a first date, Kahl," Eric looked panicked for a second, "you are the chick in the relationship - aren't you?"

Kyle laughed and considered telling Eric that he was the chick but decided not to be so cruel, "I don't like to be referred to as a chick but if you mean who gets it in the ass during sex, yes I am."

"So," Eric asked cautiously, "we've done it then?"

"Once or twice," Kyle answered. In his mind he thought 'In my fantasy's.'

They arrived at Bennigans with time to spare but were seated immediately in an intimate booth where they could talk privately but still enjoy the atmosphere. Kyle finally took off his jacket, revealing a white shirt with some gold embroidery over the pocket.

Their waiter gave them a few minutes with the menu before reappearing, "Have you made you decisions?"

Kyle answered first, "I'll start with the tomato and basil soup with extra croutons, the mushroom risotto and a fruit salad to finish."

Cartman grinned at Kyle before speaking, "The vegetable soup, are the vegetables fresh or frozen?"

The waiter shifted on his feet uncomfortably, "I think a mixture of both sir," he said.

"I'll give it a chance," he gave the waiter a look that said you'll soon know if I don't like it. "The salmon, is it poached in milk or white wine?"

Again the waiter paused in his scribbling on his pad, "White wine with a little cream."

"Good," Cartman voiced his approval, "I think I'll finish up with your raspberry cheesecake."

"And to drink?" The waiter asked.

"Still mineral water for me," Cartman answered straight away - he turned to Kyle, "the fizzy stuff gives me the hiccups."

"Lemonade please," Kyle told the waiter.

The waiter rushed off and Kyle sniggered, "I can't believe that, you were acting like you were a restaurant critic or something."

Cartman shrugged, "It got a smile out of you, so it was worth it."

It wasn't long before their first course arrived and Kyle got to watch as Eric tried to eat his soup without spilling any. His main difficulty was that he always had to fully load his spoon and Kyle couldn't help but point this out, "If you put less in each spoonful you won't get it all over your shirt."

"I guess," Eric looked chagrined.

Kyle saw his boyfriend's expression and realised that his remark was exactly the sort of thing his mother would say to his dad at a restaurant. "Sorry," he said, "pick the bowl up and drink it, if you want. I shouldn't let that sort of thing bother me."

"It's OK," Cartman said but he ate his soup more carefully after that.

Kyle was grateful when the waiter brought the main course. He took a second to enjoy the aroma, "I've just realised Eric, your not having any pork?"

"No," Cartman looked embarrassed, "I didn't want for you, to have to kiss someone with bacon breath."

"Why," Kyle teased, "Are you planning to kiss me?"

Cartman looked down at his plate, "I suppose."

"Look at me," Eric raised his head, "I was planning to kiss you, too," Kyle smiled and reached his hand out across the table. Cartman reached with his own hand and returned to smile - shyly.

When the deserts arrived Kyle pestered Eric for a taste of his delicious-looking cheesecake.

Eric looked put out, "And you think I want to taste your fruit salad," he complained - but let Kyle enjoy a forkful anyway.

Cartman surprised Kyle again by leaving a healthy tip, although Kyle wasn't nearly as surprised as the waiter - who ushered them out with an increased level of courtesy.

Kyle and Eric pressed close together as they walked back to Cartman's house. The evening sky was filled with an array of purple and orange hues, giving a magical air to the night.


	8. Chapter 8

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**WARNING: **_This Chapter describes sexual scenes of a distressing nature and may upset some people._

**Part 8**

Kyle couldn't believe that his mom had agreed to him spending the night at his boyfriend's house. Their date had been so perfect - even the bits that had gone wrong, were so right. They were both laughing when they piled into Eric's house.

"So what do you wanna do now, Kahl?" Eric asked, "Play some X-Box? Watch a movie?"

Kyle stepped into Cartman's arm and embraced him, "I want to have sex."

"Kahl?"

"Make love to me Eric," Kyle tried to sound seductive.

Cartman grinned as he lead Kyle upstairs, to his bedroom. Once inside he pulled Kyle into a passionate kiss - tongues exploring each others mouths.

Eric broke the kiss to speak, "I'm not sure how to do this."

Kyle thought about the porn he had watched on-line and his own fantasy's His fantasy's were more gentle and passionate, "We usually start by cuddling naked on the bed."

"Naked?"

"Is that a problem?"

"I'm fat Kahl," Cartman appeared to be shrinking inside his own skin, "and ugly."

"I don't care about that," Kyle grabbed his boyfriend's hand and placed it against his face. "I love you - all of you. I think you're beautiful."

"Don't say that!" Eric snapped.

"What," Kyle asked, "is beautiful too girly a word for you?"

Cartman started to shudder and sank down onto the bed, "He called be beautiful - I still remember."

Kyle was at a loss for words, he had no idea what Eric was talking about but he could see his boyfriend's distress. He sat down next to Cartman and hugged him, "Tell me."

Cartman clung to Kyle, desperately - like a man adrift at sea, "I was only four," he started.

Huh? Kyle hadn't expected that. He had thought that Eric was talking about a secret previous boyfriend or something, "It's OK, you'll feel better if you tell me." Kyle didn't know if talking about it would help Cartman or not but he wanted to know.

Cartman continues, "I was used to my mom leaving me alone so she could go out - picking up men."

Kyle was shocked - Eric's mom used to leave him alone at four.

"Anyway, one afternoon she came home with this guy. I was playing with my legos, on the rug in front of the TV, when they came in. I can remember my mom saying 'Mommy has to show this man something upstairs poopsikins' before she lead him up to her bedroom. The man looked at me weird It was a look which I hadn't seen before. I didn't think much about it. They came down after half an hour or so - I'd heard the sex noises upstairs but I was so used to it that it didn't bother me. My mom went into the kitchen to start on dinner and the guy left after giving me more of the same weird look."

Kyle knew that Cartman was about to tell him something dreadful and he clung to the larger boy - trying to offer all the support that he could. "What was the look Eric?" He asked.

"It was lust Kahl, lust," Eric paused to take a deep breath, "I guess I forgot about the man until a few days later. My mom was out so I had to fix my own supper and put myself to bed. I actually preferred the nights that she came home with a man, at least they were better than the nights that she didn't come home at all."

Kyle nodded, his hand was rubbing circles on Eric's back. Part of him didn't want to hear what Cartman was telling him but he knew he had to. Eric needed this, "It's OK, I'll still love you no matter what," he said.

"I heard her come in with someone and go upstairs. I was already in bed for the night. A little while later I was woken up by the man entering my room. I shouted but the man took pleasure in telling me that my mother was passed-out, off-her-face on drugs and wouldn't be coming."

"Eric," Kyle could feel his heart breaking as he listened.

"He raped me Kahl. I screamed until I couldn't any more and I begged him to stop - but he did it anyway. Then he forced my mouth open and he rammed it into my throat. The sick part is that all the time he was hurting me, he was telling me how beautiful I was - even though I was the son of a whore. I don't know how long it went on for, to me it seemed like forever - but afterwards he just left me there, naked and bloody."

"I'm so sorry," Kyle said.

"The worst part was that he left a note pinned to the fridge for my mom. She had found me laid on my bed, mid-morning, the next day. I think I had pissed the bed and just passed out. She knew straight away what had happened and of course she felt guilty. It was the note that freaked her out though."

"What did it say?" Kyle asked gently.

"It thanked my mom for selling him my cherry - there was two hundred dollars attached."

Kyle was appalled, "Your mom didn't."

"No Kahl she didn't. The note was a clever trick to let my mom know that if she reported him to the police he would claim that she colluded in my rape. I would have ended up in care and her in jail."

"The police wouldn't have believed him - would they?"

"You'd be surprised Kahl, a lot of prostitutes sell their kids bodies for drug money," Eric stated cynically, "Either way - I would still have been taken from her because she had failed to provide a safe environment."

"So what did she do?"

"She cleaned me up and comforted me. I held it together pretty well until she called me her beautiful boy. I guess I lost it - hysterical, I suppose. I told her that I didn't want to be beautiful any more. After that I started over-eating and demanding unhealthy foods. She told me that I'd make myself fat - but that was what I wanted. I wanted to be fat and ugly so nothing like that would ever happen to me again."

"Over the next few months I noticed that my mom got more into drugs - I think she was trying to take away her guilt. When I was six she was forced by the court to go to rehab. I had to spend the summer with my grand parents."

"I think I remember that summer."

"I had a teenage cousin who was also staying there. We had to share a bedroom and he must have known about what had happened to me two years earlier. He didn't hurt me like that man did but he paid attention to me and played with me. So when he started doing stuff to me, I let him."

"It started with him playing with my dick when we bathed together and soon he had me returning the favour. He had worked us up to blow-jobs before we were found out. he never tried to do anything anal with me but I think that he would have sooner or later."

"My grandmother knew that he'd done stuff with boys his own age but she never thought he would try anything with a little boy like me. I think that's why she left me that money when she died. She still felt guilty over what my cousin had done."

"How did it make you feel?" Kyle asked.

"At the time I thought that he cared about me and was my friend. I know now that he didn't love me - he was just using me and I was too naive to understand."

They were quiet for a while and Kyle just held his boyfriend - comforting him.

* * *

_**Authors Note:** This was a really hard chapter to write, for obvious reasons, but I felt it was integral to the story. It was important to explain why Cartman was so vunerable when it comes to relationships. I tried not to glorify the abuse in any way and I hope I managed to get the tone right._

_On a lighter note, I've finally worked our how to reply to reviews. So if you have any questions for me, you know what to do._

_Also, this is a Kyman story so it's main focus is on those two characters. In my original draft I had a whole side-story which I won't tell you about in case I work it up into a one-shot some day._


	9. Chapter 9

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**WARNING: **This Chapter features sexual scenes.

**Part 9**

"We don't have to do anything," Kyle said, "we can just cuddle and sleep. I don't want to push you if you're not ready."

"No Kahl," Eric sounded determined, "the one thing I've learned from all those bad experiences is that sex should be about love. We love each other so we should make love. It's, kind of, the point." Cartman smiled shyly, "Anyway, I want a good experience to replace the bad ones in my dreams."

Kyle leant into a kiss and they started undressing each other. Their lips broke apart as they struggled to get the last of their clothes off.

Naked, Cartman lay back onto the bed - pulling Kyle on top of him, "I'm nervous," was all he said.

Kyle gasped as he enjoyed the heat of their bodies pressed together, "There should be some lube in your top drawer," Kyle instructed Eric, "put some on your fingers and work them into my ass."

Kyle heard Eric opening the drawer with one hand, "Got it," he said. A few seconds later Kyle could feel Eric's slick fingers probing at his hole.

As Eric's digit slid deeper inside him, Kyle couldn't hold back his moans of pleasure. He couldn't believe how turned-on he was, just by the fingering. If he wasn't careful he would cum before Eric had even gotten around to entering him.

"Switch to two fingers now," Kyle directed, "and once they're in start spreading them apart - to open me up for your cock."

Cartman just grunted his acknowledgement before complying. Both boys were painfully hard now and more than ready for the highlight of the evening.

"Do you want to fuck me face-up or face-down?" Kyle managed to ask.

"Face-up," Eric replied as he moved Kyle onto his back, "I want to be able to see your eyes and kiss you while I do it." Kyle could see Cartman blushing again.

Kyle raised his legs and waited while Eric positioned himself, "Just push it in slowly - then hold it there," Kyle said.

Eric pressed his cock-head against Kyle's hole and was amazed to see how easily it entered. As he pushed further in he could feel at once the heat, tightness and the velvety softness. It was the best he had ever felt in his life. He lifted his eyes and looked at his boyfriend's face. Kyle's expression was one of deep concentration and pleasure. "I'm in," he said as he felt his pelvic bone touch Kyle's ass. Eric lowered himself onto his elbows and kissed Kyle - giving Kyle's body time to get used to the penetration.

"You feel so big," Kyle said as he wrapped his legs around Eric's waist. He had never felt such intensity before and knew it wouldn't take much to bring him to his peak.

"Fuck me," Kyle murmured in Eric's ear.

Eric complied, moving slowly in and out, letting Kyle get used to the movements before speeding up.

"Oh god, Kahl."

"Harder," Kyle shouted before crashing his mouth against Eric's - their tongues spiralling and dancing in each others mouths.

Kyle, reluctantly, broke the kiss as he neared the finish, "Eric," he said as he orgasmed. Wave after wave of ecstasy passed through his body. He could feel his anal passage twitching and spasming around Cartman's length. His prostate massaged and worked to the point beyond return.

Kyle's orgasm triggered Eric's and he bucked repeatedly into the Jewish boy - feeling his seed filling up his lover. His strength depleted, Eric collapsed, briefly, onto Kyle before rolling off and pulling Kyle with him.

Kyle felt so special as Eric held him in his arms. This had been the best day of his life and he couldn't, truly, believe how amazing it had been.

He was broken out of his thoughts by Eric kissing him on the forehead, "I love you Kosher boi," Eric whispered softly.

Oh! Kyle felt his mood drop. Eric was trying so hard to make him happy. He had even remembered the lame pet-name. It was ironic really because Eric was so huggable - just like a teddy bear and Kyle felt so happy and so loved in his arms. But it wasn't real, this was all fake. The whole relationship was built on some made-up stories from Kyle's imagination.

Kyle started to cry - he didn't deserve this love, this happiness. He had deceived Eric and had taken something precious away from him. the fact that Eric hadn't been a virgin before tonight hadn't mattered - but the manner in which he had lost his virginity had. Kyle felt he was as bad as the man who had raped four year old Eric and the cousin who had befriended and coerced him at six.

The love Eric was giving him so freely was based entirely upon his lies. Kyle felt sick - he knew he had to tell Cartman the truth.

"Sh, sh," Eric said as he rocked Kyle in his arms, "I love you."

"I'm so sorry Eric," Kyle managed between sobs.

"Silly," Eric kissed Kyle again before continuing, "you have nothing to be sorry about."

Kyle forced himself to say it, "But I lied to you," he wanted to say more - blurt out the whole story right there - but he couldn't.

"I thought you did," Kyle was puzzled by that. Eric hugged him again, "This was our first time - wasn't it?"

Kyle swallowed, technically it was true, it was their first time - but that wasn't what Kyle had lied about or what he was so upset about.

"It's OK. I'm glad we did this," Eric brought his lips to Kyle's and kissed him. "I'm so lucky to have you."

Kyle wanted to tell Eric the truth but all that could escape from his lips was, "I love you teddy bear." Cartman deserved to be loved and Kyle truly loved him. As he drifted off to sleep he tried to tell himself that the lies didn't matter.

* * *

_**Authors Note:** xEmerald Isle, I fixed the PM thing - thanx for telling me about it. Honestly, I had no idea. I feel like such an idiot (lol)._

_My first smex scene (that I've been willing to publish anyway) how did I do?._


	10. Chapter 10

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**Warning: **This Chapter contains sexual acts and implied sex scenes.

**Part 10**

"Morning Kosher boi."

"Eric," Kyle had thought that the morning after might be a bit awkward - his guilt and regrets over-weighing the genuine joy he was feeling.

"I told Kenneh that we'd meet him and Stan for breakfast at Tweaks - c'mon we've only got an hour," Eric, on the other hand, had expected the morning to be casual and fun - two people testing the boundary's of their kindling relationship and building it into something deeper and more lasting.

Eric yanked Kyle out of bed and propelled him towards the bathroom, "We'll have to share a shower," Kyle looked at Eric, "no, no for that, we have to change my sheets before we go."

Kyle looked puzzled, he was still half-asleep after all.

Cartman explained, "Do you want my mom to change them and know exactly what we did last night?"

Kyle was silent for a second, "Are you regretting last night?"

"Hell no!" Cartman shouted, "Yesterday was the best day of my life," he pulled Kyle into a kiss.

"So what's the problem then?"

"You've heard all those embarrassing pet names my mom calls me," Eric pulled a face, "do you want her to use them while referring to us making love?"

Kyle's face reddened immediately, "That would be creepy."

Eric did an impersonation of his mother, "Did my special little muffin use plenty of lube when he have sex with his boyfriend? I don't want you to get friction burns."

Kyle laughed, "Sick dude."

Cartman turned the shower on and climbed in, he offered his hand to Kyle who took it and stepped in after the larger boy.

"We can wash each other if you want," Eric said.

"I thought that you wanted to meet Stan and Kenny for breakfast," Kyle replied, "do you really think I could keep my hands off you once we started?"

"We could eat here," Eric was massaging shampoo into his hair, "I've gotten a taste for kosher."

"Fat-ass," Kyle grinned and punched his boyfriend on the shoulder.

Eric was now kissing Kyle's neck, "Hmm, delicious."

Kyle moaned, "I'm sure they won't mind if we're a few minutes late."

* * *

A little while later Eric and Kyle were rushing towards Tweaks. Despite everything they were only running a few minutes late.

"It's you fault we're late Eric," grumbled Kyle.

"It wasn't me who bent over in those those sexy y-fronts," Eric managed to reply while slightly out of breath.

"I was reaching for socks in my bag," Kyle responded indignantly.

"Kahl," Eric said, "if you insist upon wriggling your ass in such a provocative way, you should be prepared for the consequences."

Kyle grinned, "Like you trying to tear off my underwear with your teeth?"

"You weren't complaining," Eric was also grinning.

"It's a bit hard to complain when your cock is stuffed in someone's mouth," Kyle smiled dreamily as he remembered.

Cartman's face reddened.

"For your first time you did an amazing job," Kyle complemented his boyfriend.

The smile fell from Eric's face, "It wasn't my first time - remember."

"Oh god," Kyle felt sick, "I'm sorry."

"Forget it," Cartman grabbed Kyle's hand, "anyway, I've seen loads of blow-job before and I just copied the ones that seemed to work the best."

"Where have you seen so many blow-jobs, Cartman?" Kyle asked, "Have you been secretly watching gay porn on-line?"

"No Kahl!" Cartman sounded slightly offended, "I've seen loads of shit that I'd prefer to forget. You know what my mom does."

Kyle nodded, he knew that Cartman's mom was a crack whore. He had only just started to realised the sort of damage and upbringing like that would do to a child. They continued on in silence, neither one wanting to talk.


	11. Chapter 11

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

* * *

**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**Part 11**

"C'mon they've already snagged a booth," Kyle said as they entered Tweaks.

A few years ago Mr Tweak had expanded his coffee shop and now along-side the coffee was sold a selection of sandwiches, cakes, pies and salads - making it more like a diner, without the kitchen. It had soon become a popular hang-out for high schoolers and Eric, Kyle, Kenny and Stan regularly met up there for breakfast.

"Hey guys," Kyle said as they approached the booth.

Kenny's eyes moved between his two friends. He could see the signs of sex in their body language. 'Shit,' he thought, 'Kyle's gone way too far.' Kenny shook his head and tried to focus on the conversation.

"Ah've got to go to the rest-room," Eric stated, "Order my usual for me."

As soon as Cartman was out of earshot Kenny turned to Kyle, "You had sex last night."

Stan looked from Kenny to Kyle, he couldn't understand why Kenny sounded so pissed off.

"And this morning," Kyle answered, sounding pleased with himself.

"Kyle," Kenny snapped, "how do you think Cartman will feel when he finds out the truth?"

"What truth?" Stan asked.

Kenny turned to Stan, "Kyle and Cartman aren't really boyfriends. Kyle made it all up to mess with the Fat-ass. He paid me to help him but he wasn't supposed to go as far as sex though."

Stan gave Kyle a disgusted look, "Dude, why would you do that?"

"I, kind of, fell for him," Kyle answered quietly - his head bowed low in shame.

Kenny gave kyle an I-told-you-so look and Kyle seemed to shrink even more into his seat.

"You know that Cartman will be devastated when he finds out," Stan pointed out, "even I can see that he's desperately lonely and unhappy most of the time."

"Why does he ever have to find out?" Kyle asked.

Stan turned to Kyle, "You know that you can't build a long-term relationship based on lies."

"Yeah," added Kenny, "and what happens when he gets his memories back? Do you really believe that it's never going to happen?"

"It's like sitting on a time-bomb," Stan continued, "you never know when or if it will go off."

"I thought I could get him comfortable, being with me, then confess everything as gently as possible."

"I don't think there's a gentle way to tell someone something like this," Stan screwed up his eyes and pinched to bridge of his nose.

"And what about us," Kenny sounded slightly pissed off, "Cartman's our friend as well. Are we supposed to watch you use and manipulate him and do nothing?"

"I really like him," Kyle had started to cry.

Stan put his arm around his best friend's shoulders, "You know that you have to tell him the truth as soon as possible."

Kenny reached out and patted Kyle's hand, "The longer you leave it, the worse it will be."

"What if he hates me?"

"He will hate you if he finds out the truth himself," Stan told his friend.

"Dry your eyes Kyle," Kenny told him, "Eric'll be back soon."

"Yes," Stan quipped, "You wouldn't want him to see you with tears on your pretty face."

* * *

_**Authors Note:** I'll probably post the last two chapters sometime this weekend._


	12. Chapter 12

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

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**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**Part 12**

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Meanwhile Cartman had bumped into Tweek, who was restocking the rest-room

"Hey Tweek," Eric said, trying to ignore the twitching teen as he used the urinal.

"Nng, Cartman," Tweek said as he twitched.

Cartman finished up and moved over to wash his hands.

"It's good to see you out of hospital," Tweek said, "I would have visited you but, you know, the germs," he twitched and spasmed at the thought of it all.

"It's OK Tweek," Cartman smiled, "anyway, I'm out now."

"Clyde said that you had some memory loss," Tweek said to fill the awkward silence.

"Some," Eric replied as he dried his hands on a paper towel.

"Did you ever give Kyle that poem you were writing for him in English class?" Tweek asked.

Cartman's face was lit with confusion, "Poem?"

"I saw you writing it while the teacher had her back to the class."

Eric sighed, it was so frustrating that he couldn't remember so much of the weeks before his accident. Apparently he had written Kyle a love poem, he wondered if he'd given it to Kyle before the accident. "I don't remember it," he told Tweek.

"Maybe I can help you," Tweek said, "I think I saw the first line you wrote."

Eric waited patiently for Tweek to speak.

"Garr, the pressure," Tweek said while pulling at his hair.

"It's OK if you don't remember," Cartman told the twitching teen, "maybe I've still got it written down somewhere."

As Eric turned to leave the room, Tweek suddenly spoke - making Cartman jump, "Kyle the kinky something-or-other."

Eric hand paused on the door handle as the poem seeped into his head, 'Kyle the kinky kike, you can never tell just what, weird sex shit he'll like.'

The poem had triggered a return of all his lost memories. Cartman remembered school and home and hanging out with his friends. He remembered the accident - how he had taunted Kyle and how Kyle had pushed him into the road. He did not remember any relationship.

"Cartman are you alright," Tweek asked, "you're really freaking me out."

Eric's hand trembled on the door handle. Kyle had used him. He felt so dirty and violated. Why would anyone do something so cruel. Humiliating him in front of everyone at school was one thing - but making him believe that they were in love.

He pulled open the rest-room door, fully intending to confront Kyle - but when he saw him, sitting there, laughing with Stan and Kenny - he couldn't move. It felt like his chest and stomach were being crushed, he felt sick and he could barely breathe. Without even realising he let out a deep guttural sob. Suddenly all the eyes in the room were on him. He felt Kyle turn to look at him and he couldn't bare it. The idea of confronting Kyle suddenly held no appeal, so he did the only thing he could think of - he ran.

He heard the shouts of Cartman and Eric behind him but he ignored them. He charged straight across roads - half hoping he would be lucky enough to be hit again. He wanted the pain in his heart to be taken away. He wanted the oblivion of unconsciousness. He felt like he wanted to die.

Eric didn't notice how quickly he'd arrived back at his house. He almost wrenched the door open before remembering to use his key. The door was soon locked shut behind him, but even this haven was now corrupted. He wanted to run upstairs to his room but the memories of last night were too fresh there. Instead he curled up on the sofa, pulling himself into a tighter and tighter ball. His chest heaving as he openly sobbed. His mind finally stopped thinking and allowed him to sink into the unbearable pain in his heart.


	13. Chapter 13

I don't own South Park - it's owned by the very talented Trey Parker and Matt Stone.

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**Cartman, I'm Your Boyfriend **

**by cell12**

**Part 13**

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**One Week Later**

"Cartman, you've got to make the decision - do you want to be with Kyle or not?" Stan was trying to be gentle, "If you want to be with him then you have to forgive him."

"Yeah," Kenny said, "Kyle's hurting too."

It had taken Stan and Kenny almost a week of effort before Eric allowed them to see him. To their first glance it was apparent that he wasn't looking after himself. He wasn't bathing or changing his clothes and, more significantly for Cartman, he wasn't eating. During those few days Stan had gotten the full story out of Kyle and Kenny, to put it mildly he had been disappointed. it had hurt him to think that his best friend was capable of doing something so cruel.

"I don't know if I can trust him," Cartman had finally said, "Ah told him my darkest secrets and he hurt me anyway."

Their first task had been to force Cartman to shower and eat something. After a few weak protests he had let let his friends guide him. The sight of Eric being so listless and apathetic was almost unbearable. To see someone with so much confidence and determination so utterly beaten. Stan had nearly marched right over to Kyle's house and told him off all over again.

"What secrets?" Kenny asked gently.

"Ah'm sure he told you," Cartman voiced listlessly.

"He said that you'd had some really bad things happen to you," Stan was sitting at Cartman's desk, "he wouldn't tell us what they were. He said that they were your business."

Cartman looked up at Stan, "He didn't tell you guys?"

"No," Kenny, who was sitting on the bed next to his friend, said.

"So you weren't laughing about me, the other day?"

Kenny tried to fix Cartman's messy hair with his hand, "When you saw us we were teasing Kyle about how pretty he would look in a prom dress."

"Ah don't want Kahl to wear a dress," Cartman instinctively snapped.

"Why not," Kenny pushed - sensing a breakthrough, "he's so cute and girly."

"Ah don't want to date a pretend girl," Cartman said getting angry.

"But you do want to date Kyle," Stan insisted.

"Ah miss him," Cartman started crying again.

Stan got up and opened the bedroom door. Eric didn't look up as he heard someone enter the room. He could tell by the vague chocolate scent in the air that it was Kyle.

"I never meant to hurt you this badly," Kyle sounded terrible.

Eric looked up, he could see that Kyle had been suffering over the last few days, "You look almost as bad as me," he said.

"I wanted to humiliate you at school," as Kyle spoke, Eric looked deeply into his emerald green eyes. Kyle continued, "I started having feelings for you and I couldn't tell you the truth because, I thought that, if I did I would loose you."

Eric nodded, "Did you think that I would never find out?"

"I would have told you later," Kyle looked embarrassed, "I hoped you would like me enough, by then, for it to not matter."

Neither boy had noticed that their two friends had left the room.

"You didn't tell Stan and Kenneh about..." Cartman let his sentence trail off.

"No," Kyle replied, "and I wont. But I do think that you need to talk about it to someone."

Cartman shook his head, "You know how hard it is for me to trust anyone. To open up and let them see the real me."

Kyle sat down next to Eric, on the bed, "It's not about forgiving me is it. You don't know whether you can trust me any more."

"Ah want to," it broke Kyle's heart to hear Eric sounding so sad.

"I like you Eric," Kyle leaned in and kissed Cartman gently on the cheek, "will you go out with me?" He asked.

Eric didn't answer, instead he got up and looked out of the window, "When we were together you made me happy, truly happy for the first time in my life."

Kyle stood and cautiously approached his friend, "We can take things slowly. I'll give you all the time you need."

"Can you promise me that we'll be as happy as before?"

"I can only promise to try," Kyle answered.

Eric turned and reached for Kyle, lifting him into his arms, "Ah was right all along Kahl, you've turned me ghay."

"Best thing I've ever done," Kyle replied as he pressed his lips against his love.

The world wasn't saved from destruction. Kenny hadn't died in a gruesome but amusing way and nobody had gone on a wacky adventure. But in the small mountain town of South Park sometimes things change. Did Eric Cartman and Kyle Broflovski still fight? Yes, of course they did - they are who they are. But they loved too, in fact they loved each other so much that the fights ceased to matter.

- The End.

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_**Authors Note:** My first, completed, multi-chapter story. Not sure about the conclusion paragraph at the end - is it a bit sappy and lame?_

_Thanks to everyone who's taken the time to review, especially those who've reviewed more than once - you know who you are._


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